Want To Tell Me How Wrong I am

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

The REAL reason the Knicks are winning

You may have noticed that the Knicks have all of a sudden come together. They have won three in a row for the first time this weekend. It really isn’t as complicated to figure out as you might believe.
Jamal Crawford’s has the worlds largest bandage on his shoulder. Obviously they have taken Isaiah’s soul (which is clearly worthless now that he has sold it, in order to keep that Knicks coaching gig) and injected it into Crawford through his shoulder.
Mystery Solved

I Mayer May(er) not care what you think

John Mayer posted the following on his blog today

Dear Dallas and Surrounding Areas,This isn't a sports blog, and it isn't a
publicity stunt. (but have at me if it feels right.)This is about doing what I
think is right as a person, in this case speaking my mind. I have never known
anyone to have more pride in their home state and their upbringing in it than
Jessica Simpson has in Texas. I don't really follow sports, but I have played
some of my biggest and best concerts in your state, and having witnessed how
dynamic the spirit there is, I'm betting emotions are running high right about
now.All witty barbs, blogs, and fashion policing aside, that girl loves Texas
more than you know. It's one of her most defining traits as a person. So please
don't try and take that away from her. (You probably wouldn't be able to, but
it's less work for all involved.) I just thought it would mean something coming
from the guy who has the absolute least to gain from this. And if I'm out of
line in having written it, too bad. I can spare a Wednesday's worth of bad press
if it means sticking up for a good soul. JM

I think it is great that he is trying to do something nice, especially for someone he could have hard feelings toward. I do however have one issue. His complete narcissism. John do you really think there was really going to be some outcry about your "publicity stunt", and that "bad press" your not worried about? I don't see it coming. You see I don't care about the Jessica Simpson angle one bit and I care even less to get your take on it. Go back to sprinting down the Michael Bolton, love ballad, career path and let me enjoy football.

Secret Identities and Cheesy nuts... or is it Nutty Cheese

Have you ever seen Dan Shaughnessy and Jackie Macmullen in the same place at the same time. No they are the same person. I know it. Both write for the Boston Globe. Both have a completely biased love for Boston teams. Most importantly they have the same super power. The Sweet Perm. I just can’t figure which is the real identity and which is the false identity.

I am a little superstitious. A lot of times when I am truly involved in a game (see:gambling) I will turn the game off, believing it somehow affects the outcome. Many people have silly little things they do. Like all things though, moderation is always a good idea. Packer fan, you are ridiculous. I am gonna bypass the ridiculous cheese hats. I’ll go straight to the pinnacle of ludicrous mountain. What crazy nutter do we find in the shack here at the pinnacle. Hello there Jay Zollar WLUK FOX 11 Vice President and General Manager.
The station had "Seinfeld" scheduled to run at 5:30 p.m. this Saturday. After pulling the show in response to learning it was a favorite of the Giants Eli Manning. Zollar actually said the following out loud. "Why give comfort to the enemy?" adding Zollar. "Green Bay Packers fans do not want any of the New York Giants to get a good night's sleep and FOX 11 will do its part."Really, nutter. If the pack needs that much help, give up now.

A Sad Passing

Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

Tiny Tuna and Old Mother Hubbard

Dance Tina Tuna Dance
Tony Sparano is officially the head coach of the Miami Dolphins. He is unofficially a marionette to Bill Parcells. Hey I am not saying it’s a bad thing I mean, Parcells is a great leader. Why not let him pull the strings. I mean how far are we from a “I shopped for the groceries, so you make what I tell you for dinner” quote out of Bill Parcells.

Old Mother Jones, He's left all alone
With only Wade Phillips beside him

Seriously, Sparano goes to Miami. You figure he is going to take 2-3 guys with him. Now Jason Garrett is the new coach on fire, to go to Atlanta (really?) or Baltimore(no really?). Jerry Jones needs to keep him there, but not nearly as bad as Garrett needs to stay there. He’s been offensive coordinator for all of about five minutes. In that time the team he led under achieved. Also, is he just chomping at the bit to coach, Atlanta or Baltimore. I know he is a quarterbacks coach, but will he really have time to lead either of those teams and bring along who ever those two NFL bottom feeders end up using at quarterback.

Randy Moss Update

Randy's Handsy's

Update on the Randy Moss situation. He says if the court system had a charge of accident. He is guilty of that. “But for it to be called battery, is ridiculous.” He said that over an accident she is seeking 6 figures. I don’t like the extortion angle for sure but when a player start couching a situation with qualifiers, it starts looking bad.

Sports Bits

Robert Kraft was disappointed by the boos that were rained down on Anna Grant. Grant is the 14-year old girl who was booed at the start of the fourth quarter when she came out, wearing a Patriots jersey to be honored for winning the Punt, Pass, Kick competition. Kraft has decided to give this girl the opportunity to receive the cheers she deserves. She will be on the field for the coin toss this weekend at the AFC Championship game.
You will rarely see me throw out a pro Patriots bit. This however is one of those times. I do not have a real bone to pick with classless fans (that’s another rant though). I do however really appreciate classy moves. This is certainly one by Kraft.

Randy Moss was hit with a temporary restraining order. A woman Moss admit knowing for 11 years has said she was hit and kept from receiving medical treatment by moss. She also claims he has guns inaddition to a "drug and alchohol" problem. Let's not rush to judgement though. A lot of people have been waiting for Moss to implode this year. I don't really think this is it. No criminal chargers were filed, and it really doesn't take anything to get a temporary restraining order, especially if the other party has no interest in contesting it. He also has said if the charges come, he will "stand up and do whats right". Again more maturity on Moss's part.

According to ProFootballTalk league sources are saying Tony Dungy is out in Indianapolis, and Jim Caldwell is in as head coach. Caldwell has been the quarterbacks coach as well as an assistant head coach. I certainly am not surprised. After hearing that his son had enrolled a school in Tampa Bay.I figured that Dungy, a religous and family oriented man, was gone. I am disappointed to see such a great man leave the league but I know he will now start to contribute in a whole new realm.

Buffalo Bills Offseason

Outside Shot

Next time someone tells you they are a real fan ask ‘em if they have one of these

Buffalo Bills - So MR. Buffalo Bills, Marv Levy just walked out the door. What to do, what to do? Well, somebody slam it shut before J.P.Losman gets out the door as well. He has asked to be traded rather than playing out the last season of his contract in Buffalo. I actually say trade him, you aren’t exactly knocking on the door to the Superbowl. Unless you are prepared to commit to him as your starter, which you can’t do with Edwards there as well. Instead go out and get some help for your various needs. Losman, still a reasonable quarterback prospect, should garner some decent offers in the Quarterback poor state that the NFL is now.

The Bills Offense is strong at big play receiver, with Lee Evans. A position that is in great need on several teams. They also are getting strong play at running back from Last years draft pick Marshawn Lynch. They do however have needs as far a Tight End and a possession type receiver. They have a few very good 3rd receivers but none I would really consider a true #2. Though we could see Roscoe Parrish in that role. Offensive Coordinator Steve Fairchild is gone off to Colorado St. It will be interesting to see what the Post Levy team does about this opening.
Their Defensive front is serviceable, but needs improvement. This will come with the return of John McCargo who was injured this year and the front will be freed up by the return of Linebacker Paul Poslusnuzy from his season long injury. While these additions will help, the biggest positive for the Defense will be continuity. Safety Jim Leonhard is the only starter going into free agency. Since they have a general balance of good not great across the board on defense I think they would be smart to look to get a bigger more physical presence on the Defensive line since they were a sieve against the run.

You couldn’t help but pull for these guys this year. If you weren’t pumped when you saw Kevin Everett walking into that locker room, you need to get back to your coffin(just kidding Joe Pa)

Football Bits

Darren McFadden declared for the NFL Draft, on Monday. He could very well be the first Running back to go number one over all since Kijanna Carter. I mean hey, who doesn’t want to follow in that legacy. 1114 yards in ten years. That is a solid 7 yards a game. Thanks for showing up.

WVU-Michigan-Arkansas Love/Hate Triangle
Ryan Mallet who has withdrawn from Michigan with the arrival of Rich Rodriguez and his spread offense. Bobby Petrino and Ryan Mallet. Check out quitter camp. SUUUUEYYY.
Alright that was harsh, I really don’t blame Mallet. It isn’t like Rodriguez threw the welcome mat out.
Speaking of Rodriguez throwing stuff out, it seems that the records for every player who is currently at West Virginia University has disappeared.

Hall of Fame
It is voting time for the Pro Football hall of Fame. From a list of 111 players the list is now down to 17 finalists.
Two of the sure first Ballot guys are Minnesota Vikings wide receiver Cris Carter and Washington Redskins defensive back Darrell Green .
The remaining 15 by position

- Derrick Thomas
- Randy Gradishar
- Andre Tippett;

Wide receivers
- Art Monk
- Andre Reed

Defensive ends
- Fred Dean
- Richard Dent

Offensive guards
- Russ Grimm
- Bob Kuecnenberg
- Randall McDaniel

Offensive tackle
- Gary Zimmerman

- Ray Guy

. To be selected, a player must receive a minimum of 80 percent of the 44 votes. The 44-member panel consists of one media representative from each pro football city with two from New York, inasmuch as that city has two teams in the National Football League. A 33rd member is a representative of the Pro Football Writers of America and there are 11 at-large delegates.
I know Carter is a lock, but I will be interested to see how Randall McDaniel does. He was a premier guard for his era.
Outside ShotAfter the success that the NHL had with their outdoor game on January 1, 2008. The Arena Football league is giving it a try